15 Things I Didn’t Learn at Cannes Lions

Every year after Cannes Lions, everyone posts their “10 Things I Learned at Cannes.” The future of advertising. The future of AI. The future of creators. The future of brands.

I thought I’d do something different.

After a week at Cannes, some of the things I remember most had absolutely nothing to do with what happened on stage. They involved missed activations, melting train tracks, terrible Wi-Fi, questionable amounts of alcohol, celebrity selfies I was too shy to ask for, and people I spent four days trying to find.

So here are 15 things I didn’t learn at Cannes Lions.

1. 1. I didn’t need to pre-register for activations.

   People who had been to Cannes before told me to sign up for activations before I arrived. I did not listen. Technically, you can just show up. You can also stand in line for 30 or 40 minutes, finally reach the front, and hear, “Did you register?” When you say no, they’ll very nicely tell you that you can wait and see if there’s room.

   There will not be room.

   Next time, I’m booking everything before I even pack my bags.

2. 2. The Smirnoff slushies are just refreshing frozen drinks.

   Cannes was in the middle of a heat wave, so when someone hands you a cold Smirnoff slushie, it feels like a gift from the universe. It’s icy. It’s delicious. It’s exactly what you need after walking around in 35-degree heat.

   It also contains alcohol.

   This probably should have been obvious from the word Smirnoff, but apparently I needed to learn this one myself. Hydrate accordingly.

3. 3. It’s only a 10-minute train ride.

   I had this one planned perfectly. The next session was only a 10-minute train ride away. Plenty of time.

   Except it was so hot that the trains were delayed because of the heat. Suddenly, that quick trip wasn’t so quick, and no, I did not make the session.

   At Cannes, “10 minutes away” should be treated less like a measurement of time and more like an expression of optimism.

4. 4. I’ll get that celebrity selfie later.

   I had more than one moment where someone I recognized was right there. I could have walked over and asked for a selfie. Instead, I got shy. Maybe I shouldn’t bother them. Maybe I’ll see them again. Maybe there will be a better moment later.

   There wasn’t.

   I literally build a platform around sharing moments, and even I forgot one of the most important rules: take the selfie. Don’t be shy at Cannes. Ask.

5. 5. Comfortable shoes are optional.

   Cannes looks incredibly glamorous in photos. What the photos don’t show you are the 25,000 steps between all that glamour.

   By Day 3, your footwear stops being a fashion decision and becomes infrastructure. Wear the shoes you can actually walk in. Your feet will thank you.

6. 6. I’ll remember everyone I meet.

   Of course you’ll remember them. You just had an amazing 20-minute conversation. You know what they do, where they work, what you talked about, and why you absolutely need to stay in touch.

   Three days later, you’re looking through your camera roll thinking, I loved this person. What was their name again?

   Take the selfie. Then take a photo of their conference badge. Future you will be very grateful.

7. 7. I’ll answer emails in the evenings.

   You will not.

   Next.

8. 8. The best conversations happen on stage.

   Some of them do. But many of my favourite conversations happened while looking for coffee, walking between events, sitting on the beach, waiting in line, getting lost, or trying to figure out where I was supposed to be next.

   Cannes brings thousands of people together to talk about advertising, technology, media, creativity and culture. But the interesting part is what happens between all the scheduled things. People meet people. Conversations turn into introductions. Introductions turn into dinners. And sometimes a completely random moment becomes one of the best parts of the week.

9. 9. Dinner is only 15 minutes away.

   I was invited to a dinner that was supposedly nearby. Thirty-five minutes of walking in the Cannes heat later, “nearby” had taken on a very different meaning.

   Ubers will take forever. A taxi could cost €50 for what should have been a 15-minute drive. I was hot, sweaty and at least mildly concerned about heat stroke.

   And it was completely worth it.

   I met so many great people around that dinner table. By the end of the night, nobody cared about the walk there. You forget the walk. You remember the people.

10. 

    10. Espresso martinis come in pint glasses.

    Then I met the Verve team from Ireland.

    They literally ordered me a pint of espresso martini served in a Guinness glass. Not a large martini. Not two martinis. A pint.

    It may have been the most Irish thing that happened to me in France all week, and I loved every ridiculous minute of it.

11. 11. I’ll only see celebrities from a distance.

    One of the surprising things about Cannes is how quickly someone you normally only see on a screen can suddenly be right in front of you. Not across a giant auditorium. Not behind a velvet rope. You can literally find yourself sitting in the front row.

    Which, once again, brings me back to lesson #4: take the selfie.

12. 12. The Grindr House is just a party.

    I went to the Grindr party and had a great time. Then I discovered something slightly embarrassing: they had been hosting incredible talks and sessions all week.

    All. Week.

    I had no idea.

    The houses and brand activations at Cannes aren’t just places to get a drink at night. Some have genuinely fantastic programming during the day. Next time, I’m reading the schedules and not just the party invitations.

13. 13. Conference Wi-Fi is good enough for a live demo.

    I brought Fenel to Cannes, and naturally, I wanted to show people the actual product. Fenel is built around sharing moments, including selfies and photos, which means my live demo required one fairly important ingredient: internet.

    You can probably guess how this went.

    There are few things more humbling than enthusiastically showing someone your product and then standing together watching a selfie upload at approximately one pixel per fiscal quarter.

    I now have a new founder rule: Hope for great Wi-Fi. Plan for a nothing-burger connection.

    And always bring the pre-recorded demo.

14. 14. They’re only a 10-minute walk away. I’ll definitely run into them.

    There were three people I specifically wanted to see at Cannes. I knew they were there. They knew I was there. At various points, I was apparently only 10 minutes away from each other.

    Surely I would bump into them.

    I did not.

    Cannes somehow manages to put everyone you know within a few blocks of each other while simultaneously making them impossible to find.

15. 15. Expect to bump into people you know. Part 2.

    By Day 4, I had accepted defeat. I wasn’t going to see them. I stopped trying to coordinate. The Cannes Universe had won.

    And then I left Cannes, got on a boat, went to La Guérite and somehow, on a random island, there they were.

    Of course.

    Because apparently the secret to finding someone at Cannes is to spend four days trying to meet them, completely give up, leave the city, get on a boat and go to an island.

    Then you’ll bump into them.

    Cannes has a funny way of making the impossible happen.

    Maybe that’s the real reason I keep coming back.

    For all the stages, activations, parties, beaches, brands and big ideas, the things I remember most are the moments I didn’t plan. The dinner I almost skipped. The person I randomly sat beside. The selfie I almost didn’t take. The conversation that happened while I was lost. The people I couldn’t find until somehow, impossibly, I did.

    I went to Cannes to meet people, experience the festival and share what we’re building at Fenel. I came home with a camera roll full of moments, a lot of stories, and a lot of people I’m very glad I met.

    Maybe that’s Cannes.

    You arrive with a schedule. You leave with stories.

    See you next year.